The Captain’s Log

Toplevel | Pontifications of The Great and Terrible Captain Cucamunga.

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Fri, 06 Mar 2026 12:21:06 EST

It with sadness that I reveal that…

donut does not derive from dough nought, which is to say a zero made of dough. I want it to be true with all my heart, but no evidence supports this derivation.

Fri, 06 Mar 2026 11:27:01 EST

As It Were

The idiom, as it were, means, as if it were so. As it were indicates that the entity the phrase modifies is metaphorical. He went AWOL, as it were, from school. He inhaled his breakfast, as it were, before the rest of us had even begun to eat.

The Great and Terrible Captain Cucamunga hereby orders you not to use as it were because it is unnecessary. All those who disobey this commandment must wear white t-shirts with black lettering that reads, “The captain is disappointed with me.” You’re on the honor system on this matter.

Sun, 01 Mar 2026 15:50:07 EST

Confabulation

The noun confabulation appears in English in the mid-15th century. Confabulation derives from the Latin confabulatio, which means a conversation, literally, the telling of stories together.

Today, confabulation means a casual conversation or an unintentionally inaccurate recall. In the first sense, more than one person converses. In the second sense, one person misremembers.

Tue, 24 Feb 2026 16:39:31 EST

Traction

The noun traction names a pulling force. To gain, to have, or to apply traction is to gain, to have, to apply a literal or figurative pulling force. Traction ultimately derives from the Latin verb trahere, which means to pull.

Traction does not mean adhesive friction. Adhesive friction enables traction. So says the Great and Terrible Captain Cucamunga.

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