Thu, 03 Jul 2025 10:43:07 EDT
Consider These Sentences
The following sentences occur in an article in The Guardian on Apple News.
“A US military veteran, previously pardoned by Donald Trump for his role in the 6 january 2021 attack on the US Capitol, was sentenced to life in prison this week for plotting to attack an FBI office and assassinate other law enforcement officers.
“Edward Kelley, 36, was found guilty last November of trying to attack officers who investigated him over his actions at the Capitol in Washington DC when pro-Trump supporters tried [sic] stormed the building in hopes, ultimately in vain, of stopping the certification of Joe Biden’s presidential victory over Trump in the 2020 election.”
Verbiage. I will collapse these paragraphs into one.
There is no need to describe in detail the actions and intent of the January 6th insurrectionists.
The phrase trying to attack is an understatement of what Mister Kelley planned to do.
My rewrite: “On Wednesday, a Knoxville court sentenced Edward Kelley to life in prison for plotting to murder employees of the FBI, the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation, the Tennesee Highway Patrol, the Maryville Police Department, the Blount County Sheriff’s Office, and the Clinton Police Department. Kelley, 36, was one of the individuals pardoned by President Trump for crimes committed during the Capitol insurrection of Janurary 6th 2021. A judge subsequently decided that the pardon did not apply to this case and allowed Kelley’s prosecution to proceed.”